Dilema
At last, a post to get 'Zombie Attack' off the front page.
I had a dilema yesterday. I made a choice.
I am interested to know what you would have done if you were in my shoes.
A homeless man came to church yesterday and told me he had 'lost' his wife. She had left and he didn't know where was was. Could I ring the shelter that he thinks she might have gone to to check if she is there?
I say sure.
I make the call an as soon as I introduce myself and mentioned the ladies name, the social worker tells me that she knows this couple well.
But, they are not married.
He is a chronic abuser.
This social worker has been there to witness when he put his 'wife' into hospital. She tells me that the lady is staying with them but wants nothing more to do with him. (Which is a good thing). She is now sober and has the support of her family in getting back on track. She tells me not to let him know where she is.
Oh, did I mention that at the moment we are doing the 10 Commandments in bible study? Haven't reached #9 yet (do not bear false witness), but we are close.
So I walk back outside and say to the guy . . .
[To be continued]
What would you have said?
What should I have said?
Scott
3 comments:
hey scott...this is a tough one. if he had asked me to check i would have wondered if maybe this was an abuse situation (but that's probably cos i watch too many hallmark type movies!), so i really don't know what i would have done. maybe i would have let him speak directly to the social worker but then again getting her to lie is possibly just an indirect way of me doing the same thing. have to give it more thought. keen to hear what you finally decided to do...mel :)
Well, a deontological ethic would say that your should tell him that she is there. Another word for this is 'divine command theory' - God says it, do it, no questions asked.
But.....biblical ethics are not that simple. To tell an abuser where a woman is (whom he can then track down and further abuse) is a terribly unloving act towards the woman. It shows no care for her state of affairs and the command to 'not bear false witness' becomes a barrier to hide behind whilst not loving the woman involved.
Also, he lied to you! He is deceiving you and using you to get into a position where he can cause more harm.
If he had come to your with the truth and said "I am looking for a woman whom I have constantly abused and who has run away from me" - you would never have agreed to help him out of a 'love ethic' in the first place!
ALL the commands can be summed up in this "Love God and love neighbor'.
What did you do??????
that last comment sounded like I was a wanker.
I got the content across, but I sounded far too much like a Sydney Anglican blogger
....sorry
argghh !!
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